Oh, how these last few chapters have spoke to me! Especially Chapter 8, Due to Circumstances beyond Our Control. Sometimes I feel like this is my entire life. I know it isn't but there have been large spans of time where it has.
From 2000 to 2007, I was remarried, had 4 more children, lost one child to a birth defect and lost my husband to cancer and then broke my foot and couldn't drive for 3 months and I was the only adult in my house! (I'm not going in to details because it is too lengthy and not the purpose of this post but you can read about it in earlier posts and on my other blog: http://molliechristina.blogspot.com/)
In this I learned, I can't control everything. In fact, there is very little I can control. God will never leave nor forsake me, no matter how hard the situation is. God does work All things for good. He showed me that He loves me and He will work in every situation. He brought people into my life who were His hands and feet and who walked with me through this time. There were things He did that I didn't understand at the time that make more sense now looking back.
I would like to say that I have kept these lessons close, but I still tend to desire control. I remind myself of what God has done and His sovereignty and it helps me loosen my white-knuckle grip!
July 25, 2009
What God has brought together....
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Hampering Home
In my control freak nature, I have become a dictator in my own home! I have a certain way for everything and I really do not like it when something is not done my way. I have been known to clear all the towels out of the closet and refold them after some well meaning family member has worked hard to do it for me, just because they weren't folded MY way!! Wow, it makes me cringe to think of it.
In Chapter 6, I love the 'Two Plus Two Equals Four' section. It is a great reminder that there are more than one way to do things.
I am learning, slowly but surely, that not everything has to be MY way. There is no right way to a lot of things. If something is dangerous then of course there needs to be a change but most of the time it's a matter of preference.
This verse: She watches over the activities of her household ~ Proverbs 31:27 HCSB reminds me that my job is to watch over not do everything!! I need my families help to make our house run smoothly. However, they aren't likely to help me if I am so particular.
My prayer is that I will learn to loosen the grip.
Lord,
I want to be a wife and mother who watches over my household and enlists others to help so we can work together. I want to be calm and peaceful so that I can set the tone for my home. Help me to let go of this deep need to over control. Help me to trust You in all situations so that I will be more calm.
Thank You.
Amen
In Chapter 6, I love the 'Two Plus Two Equals Four' section. It is a great reminder that there are more than one way to do things.
I am learning, slowly but surely, that not everything has to be MY way. There is no right way to a lot of things. If something is dangerous then of course there needs to be a change but most of the time it's a matter of preference.
This verse: She watches over the activities of her household ~ Proverbs 31:27 HCSB reminds me that my job is to watch over not do everything!! I need my families help to make our house run smoothly. However, they aren't likely to help me if I am so particular.
My prayer is that I will learn to loosen the grip.
Lord,
I want to be a wife and mother who watches over my household and enlists others to help so we can work together. I want to be calm and peaceful so that I can set the tone for my home. Help me to let go of this deep need to over control. Help me to trust You in all situations so that I will be more calm.
Thank You.
Amen
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
My Valentine Proposal
I am one of those girls who really isn't in to the whole roses and candy and forced love because the calendar, and society, says you have to. In fact, I would much prefer to celebrate love every day. I have tried to make it a special day for my kids so that they know they are loved by me and especially by a loving God. If you read my blog last year you know about the "Pink Party" tradition my family started. If you haven't read that, you can here: http://robinsonfamily2009.blogspot.com/2012/02/our-pink-party.html.
Anyway, 4 years ago, I was a widow with 5 kids and I had met a wonderful, sweet, and Godly man. We had been dating for awhile and I already knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. I was pretty sure he felt the same way. However, he hadn't asked me yet. I was sure he would pick a fabulous way and an equally fabulous day, like Christmas or New Years Eve or even New Years Day. All three of those days had come and gone with no question and no ring. I was beginning to wonder.
I discussed it with my bestest friend, my cousin Summer. She said "Maybe he is waiting to ask you on Valentine's Day!" I replied, "Uh, no, pretty sure not that day." She was confused because she had met him and she was also pretty sure he was smitten with me as well. So she questioned how I could be so sure. I sheepishly said "Well, we were talking about Valentine's Day and how so many people become engaged or get married on that day and I sort of said I thought it was hokey! I told him I would never want a Valentine's wedding or proposal." She was flabbergasted! "Tell him you changed your mind!" As if that would make a difference. "Yeah, right, like he would believe that. I guess I'll just have to wait and wonder."
Well, Valentine's day was approaching and he told me he wanted to do something with me that day. My sweet friend Sandy came the Friday before to be part of our pink party and to watch the kids on Saturday. We had our pink party and made plans for him to pick me up the next morning.
As we were leaving my house, he handed me a small envelope and a rose. In the envelope were a card with a message from my brother, a card with a message from my cousin and a little note explaining it. The note said that my house was the place he first met my family and he knew how special they are to me. There was another small card that just said 'Will'. Next, we drove to the Highschool and parked by the football field. He handed me another rose and a card from Nathan and a note that explained this place. The note said that this was the first time I asked him to pray with me when Nathan had been injured playing football. Another small card inside just had the word 'You'. I was crying from the sweet things Nathan had to say and the realization of where this was going. He decided not to give me any more of the One word cards until later.
The day continued with visits to many of the places we had visited while dating. The last place was a small spot on the 5 mile drive at Point Defiance park overlooking the water. He handed me all the cards that had one word on them and asked me to put them in order. While I was busy working he played the guitar and sang worship songs. When all together they said "Will You Spend The Rest Of Your Life" and then he pulled one more out of his shirt pocket that said "With Me" and had a ring attached! I was speechless! He had managed to surprise me. I later found out that he had also sent me the same message in texts over a number of days. The first word of the first text each day was one of the words in the proposal message. I guess it goes without saying, he puts a lot of thought into things! :)
Later when I asked him why he decided on Valentine's Day after what I had said he replied "Because I knew it would be the last day you would think I would do it."
So now Valentine's Day has new meaning for me. It is the day he asked and I said Yes!
Anyway, 4 years ago, I was a widow with 5 kids and I had met a wonderful, sweet, and Godly man. We had been dating for awhile and I already knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. I was pretty sure he felt the same way. However, he hadn't asked me yet. I was sure he would pick a fabulous way and an equally fabulous day, like Christmas or New Years Eve or even New Years Day. All three of those days had come and gone with no question and no ring. I was beginning to wonder.
I discussed it with my bestest friend, my cousin Summer. She said "Maybe he is waiting to ask you on Valentine's Day!" I replied, "Uh, no, pretty sure not that day." She was confused because she had met him and she was also pretty sure he was smitten with me as well. So she questioned how I could be so sure. I sheepishly said "Well, we were talking about Valentine's Day and how so many people become engaged or get married on that day and I sort of said I thought it was hokey! I told him I would never want a Valentine's wedding or proposal." She was flabbergasted! "Tell him you changed your mind!" As if that would make a difference. "Yeah, right, like he would believe that. I guess I'll just have to wait and wonder."
Well, Valentine's day was approaching and he told me he wanted to do something with me that day. My sweet friend Sandy came the Friday before to be part of our pink party and to watch the kids on Saturday. We had our pink party and made plans for him to pick me up the next morning.
As we were leaving my house, he handed me a small envelope and a rose. In the envelope were a card with a message from my brother, a card with a message from my cousin and a little note explaining it. The note said that my house was the place he first met my family and he knew how special they are to me. There was another small card that just said 'Will'. Next, we drove to the Highschool and parked by the football field. He handed me another rose and a card from Nathan and a note that explained this place. The note said that this was the first time I asked him to pray with me when Nathan had been injured playing football. Another small card inside just had the word 'You'. I was crying from the sweet things Nathan had to say and the realization of where this was going. He decided not to give me any more of the One word cards until later.
 |
| Putting the cards in order |
The day continued with visits to many of the places we had visited while dating. The last place was a small spot on the 5 mile drive at Point Defiance park overlooking the water. He handed me all the cards that had one word on them and asked me to put them in order. While I was busy working he played the guitar and sang worship songs. When all together they said "Will You Spend The Rest Of Your Life" and then he pulled one more out of his shirt pocket that said "With Me" and had a ring attached! I was speechless! He had managed to surprise me. I later found out that he had also sent me the same message in texts over a number of days. The first word of the first text each day was one of the words in the proposal message. I guess it goes without saying, he puts a lot of thought into things! :)
 |
| The sunset right before the proposal |
Later when I asked him why he decided on Valentine's Day after what I had said he replied "Because I knew it would be the last day you would think I would do it."
So now Valentine's Day has new meaning for me. It is the day he asked and I said Yes!
Let go, girl!
As I said in my last post, I struggle with control. I have lots of excuses, ahem....justifications, for this but the bottom line is that it is rooted in pride and mistrust. I think I know better and I don't really trust any one, including God, to do it just right. I am pretty sure that if I want a job done right I will have to do it myself!
The online study I am involved in is using the book "Let. It. Go." by Karen Ehman. I am learning a lot in just the first few chapters. I am learning where I struggle most and how to give it up to God. My prayer is that I will continue to let go and let God and walk away from my pride and fully trust Him with the results.
Lord,
I confess that I struggle with control. I confess that my pride and mistrust usurps Your authority in my life most of the time. I confess that I often choose to go my own way rather than wait on You. Lord, I pray that You will fill me with Your spirit. I pray that I can remember the work You have done in my life and that I will release the white-knuckle grip I have on my future. I pray that I will remember your words, "Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails." Proverbs 19:21 Lord, I give You control over All of my life; my past, present and future, my children, my husband, my plans and my dreams. I trust that You have an eternal perspective and I trust You hand in it all. Thank You Lord that You are infinitely patient with me. Thank You Lord that You love me even with all my flaws. Thank You for Your word that does change people. Thank You for the people You have placed in my life to help point me back to You.
In Jesus Name,
Amen
The online study I am involved in is using the book "Let. It. Go." by Karen Ehman. I am learning a lot in just the first few chapters. I am learning where I struggle most and how to give it up to God. My prayer is that I will continue to let go and let God and walk away from my pride and fully trust Him with the results.
Lord,
I confess that I struggle with control. I confess that my pride and mistrust usurps Your authority in my life most of the time. I confess that I often choose to go my own way rather than wait on You. Lord, I pray that You will fill me with Your spirit. I pray that I can remember the work You have done in my life and that I will release the white-knuckle grip I have on my future. I pray that I will remember your words, "Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails." Proverbs 19:21 Lord, I give You control over All of my life; my past, present and future, my children, my husband, my plans and my dreams. I trust that You have an eternal perspective and I trust You hand in it all. Thank You Lord that You are infinitely patient with me. Thank You Lord that You love me even with all my flaws. Thank You for Your word that does change people. Thank You for the people You have placed in my life to help point me back to You.
In Jesus Name,
Amen
Thursday, February 7, 2013
My tendency to control
Hello, my name is Christina and I have the tendency to control. I am an enabler and martyr. I use these means to control people and situations. I like to control all aspects of my home, even how the dishwasher is loaded and the towels are folded. I like to 'help' others with projects and activities and wind up taking a lead most of the time. I have often thought I was a lost cause, but I have Hope!
The Lord is working in me. He wants me to have peace and be free to Let. It. Go. I am so excited for this book by Karen Ehman and the online bible study with Melissa Taylor.
I hope to learn how to let go of the unimportant and to relax a bit. I hope to learn how to focus on what really is important and not let other things control me.I hope to be able to say that my trust is fully in the Lord and I give Him full control of my life.
The Lord is working in me. He wants me to have peace and be free to Let. It. Go. I am so excited for this book by Karen Ehman and the online bible study with Melissa Taylor.
I hope to learn how to let go of the unimportant and to relax a bit. I hope to learn how to focus on what really is important and not let other things control me.I hope to be able to say that my trust is fully in the Lord and I give Him full control of my life.
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